The Beauty of Obscurity
5 minute read
Obscurity is very underrated these days. I guess it always has been, that’s sort of the point isn’t it? Underrated, overlooked, in the background, unnoticed. Those are not usually the descriptions we want relating to us or the things we do. We want to matter. We want to make a difference and we want our efforts to be noticed!
But whose attention actually matters? Can we ‘matter’ in obscurity? Can we be contributing to the betterment of the world even if few ever notice?
In this age of Internet and viral fame, there is a strange mentality that has saturated us. This idea of needing validation for everything we do has driven us to photograph and post almost every aspect of our lives. Is the meal I prepared as delicious if I don’t plate it just so, use my macro filter to snap a shot of it, post it and get multiple likes on Instagram? Does my kid know I love them even if I haven’t posted a paragraph of how cool they are on Facebook for their birthday? (public service announcement: Facebook isn’t as cool to the younger generation and my kids hardly use it anyway).
Before you think this is an anti-social media article, let me get to my point: I don’t think there is anything wrong with sharing pieces of our lives with people in order to build connection, but I do think many of us have fallen into a state of mind that seeks validation from those around us in order to believe that what we are doing is valid. We seem to believe that it’s not about WHAT we are doing, or even the DOING of it, but how people respond to us as a result that tells us if we are spending our lives in a valuable way. The problem with this is obvious: who should really have the authority to appraise us and our work?
Recently I have been challenged by a reference to monastic living. You know, monks living in monasteries up in the mountains of Nowhere? These people devoted their lives to serving in obscurity, and yet, they saw what they were doing as infinitely valuable.
Brother Lawrence was one such individual. He was a Christian monk from France who lived in the 1600s and wrote letters to his friends which detailed his life in a monastery, and the peace & joy he found in experiencing the presence of God moment to moment. He also had some conversations with people while he served in quiet simplicity. Those letters and conversations were later compiled into a book that, fortunately for us, is now widely available- but the whole point of “Practicing the Presence of God” is finding value in each ordinary moment. It’s about believing that God sees it and that He is more interested in the motive behind the work we do, than what the work may ‘accomplish’.
Here are a few short quotes, which are very brain-stretching for people like me who have been performance-oriented and crave validation;
“… we ought not to be weary of doing little things for the love of God, who regards not the greatness of the work, but the love with which it is performed.”
“ It is not necessary to have great things to do, I turn my little omelet in the pan for the love of God.”
"He does not ask much of us, merely a thought of Him from time to time, a little act of adoration, sometimes to ask for His grace, sometimes to offer Him your sufferings, at other times to thank Him for the graces, past and present, He has bestowed on you, in the midst of your troubles to take solace in Him as often as you can. Lift up your heart to Him during your meals and in company; the least little remembrance will always be the most pleasing to Him. One need not cry out very loudly; He is nearer to us than we think." ~ Brother Lawrence
Did you hear that? It is not necessary to have great things to do? We shouldn’t grow weary of doing the little things? God does not ask much of us?! Are these statements culturally unfamiliar for you too?
We have come so far from these simple truths that we try to make the little things seem great by splashing them around for as many people to notice as possible! Could it be that we are missing some of the peace and joy that Brother Lawrence experienced because we are stiving after our own form of celebrity? Do we need EVERYTHING we do to be celebrated in some form? It may not be wrong for me to take a few photos of my omelet, to use a filter on it before I post it, and to check back for what responses people gave me. The real question is, can I enjoy my omelet without all of that?
Working in a BRS youth home requires that one celebrate the small successes and serve in ordinary ways even when it is met with ingratitude and zero fanfare. That also sounds like parenting in a nutshell, doesn’t it? Most of the crucial service we do in this life will fall into the category of ordinary & unremarkable, which keeps us unpretentious. But we need to recognize the value of these small, everyday ways we are making a difference in this life. Though our impact may be “not discovered or known about” in the public eye, there is a beauty in obscurity when you are faithfully giving your best.
“Don’t do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven. 2When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get. 3But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. 4Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.” Matthew 6:1-4
Reference links: Brother Lawrence Quotes (Author of The Practice of the Presence of God) (goodreads.com)
https://open.spotify.com/episode/5ilXqWJzPBIs5UJx78fpjK?si=fba7364ad6014a0f
